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Update: The Road To Hell Is Paved With Good Intentions

Hi folks this is Retro Dee with an update. I have every intention of making another blog post for Retro Dee’s Guide, but I’ve been exhausted both mentally and physically and I am having serious trouble concentrating. My life is is such chaos. What the fuck is going on, I don’t know. And I don’t apologize for it either. Also I don’t like this new editor font, WordPress.

My problems notwithstanding, it’s not easy keeping a blog about the 1950’s in today’s world. Imagine trying to write a tribute post to Jerry Lee Lewis and getting interrupted by the death of Aaron Carter. It sounds silly, but it’s hard to be a fan of early Rock n Roll and have grown up in another time. It’s like, I try not to care about Backstreet Boys or anything from “my day”. Why should that matter now? I love early Rock n Roll; oldies are my life. But the truth is, it wasn’t my era. It wasn’t my past. I wish I had no reaction when I hear the songs from my past, but I do. I really do. And I before I decided to go all the way back to the 1950’s, I knew plenty about the stars of my day too.

Aaron Carter was a little after my time. I was a BSB fan, and honestly, I wondered why Nick’s baby brother had an album and why he had to go on tour with them. He should’ve been home asleep, it was past his bedtime. And yet, he came with the tour package. So I accepted him.

I might be Little Ms. 1950’s, but yes, there was a time that I loved Backstreet Boys, like most of the girls around my age. “Shape of My Heart” was my favorite song of theirs. There’s a recent video of Aaron singing along to it, not long before he died. He was giving props to Nick, saying he got his brother’s back. It was nice to see, after all the turmoil their relationship had been through. And it brought back memories of how much I loved that song. I used to think that Backstreet Boys were the extent of how much I could love music. I had no idea that my real love for music lay hidden in the jukeboxes at the local retro diner.

But back to the recently the deceased…

Aaron Carter had his issues, but he was a loving soul, famous too young…. a victim of the industry, addiction and mental issues that no one has the right to judge. He always stood up to the haters and for what he believed in — always in the face of scrutiny. And that automatically makes him a hero, of sorts, in my book.

I often ask too many questions that we will never have the answers to. Like why some people have it so easy while others do nothing but suffer. And why some people live to be 87 while others die at 22. I don’t know why I even waste time wondering this shit. But I do, and it slows down the production of this blog. It diverts me, as if my own shitter of a life didn’t do that enough.

I feel bad because I keep thinking I could do something really amazing with this blog, if I wasn’t so fucking distracted. I mean, I know someone out there likes a few of my posts. My Halloween in the 1950’s post made the 4th result on Google’s front page, which is pretty hard to do, considering I’m not selling anything… but all the other shit holds me back from making this blog what I really want it to be. Maybe things will get better so I can concentrate again. Probably not, but I’ll work on it anyway.


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